What Is It About Self-Promo That Feels So Embarrassing?

Learning to put myself "out there"

Image : Emma Chamberlain

I remember sharing how embarrassing it was to share my 1st column on Instagram. It felt like I was saying “Look at me, look at what I made”. Some friends told me it shouldn’t be embarrassing and I know that (logically). I know there is no reason for me to feel this way but it doesn’t change the anxiety and embarrassment I feel every time I have to promote myself. Honestly, sharing my photography felt less awkward than this.

You see i’m not gonna pretend like i’m super confident because as bold as I may be, I have insecurities, I feel vulnerable, and hitting the share button will always feel a bit awkward. I appreciate the compliments of me being open and bold, mostly I appreciate my loyal readers and the positive feedbacks but it’s not always as simple as it looks, so here I am admitting my flaw —maybe I’m worried my writing isn’t good enough. Maybe I’m afraid it comes across as like I’m looking for attention. Maybe I am not confident enough? Maybe I’m scared of the judgment: “Who does she think she is?”

If I had a choice i’d rather not promote myself. But today not having to promote yourself is a luxury, not needing social media to promote your brand or your art is a luxury, a luxury I don’t have. Social media is practically an essential now to promote yourself.

What a shame it is, how we spend so much time on our art, on our writing, on our work only to feel embarrassed by sharing it. We pour our hearts and dedication into creating something meaningful, something that shows our passion and who we are and yet we hesitate when it’s time to put it out there. Why the fuck does it feel like we are apologizing for our own passion?

It’s frustrates me really, especially because I don’t know how to get myself out of this feeling. I should be proud of what I created, not ashamed or nervous about how it will be perceived. But perhaps that’s part of the process? Pushing through the discomfort, jumping off the cliff without considering the consequences, to share our work not because we are seeking validation but because we deserve to be seen even if it’s by one person.

We shouldn’t let embarrassment hold us back obviously, but perhaps we should focus on the process of creating and why we do it in the first place. We share our work because it matters to us and if that means feeling a bit uncomfortable along the way, so be it.